Many people wait until there is a crisis before they think about getting help from a life coach or counsellor. However, this can sometimes mean that it’s almost too late. It is all too easy to become overwhelmed by all that is happening in life, and in this scenario it may seem as though coaching and counselling just adds to the burden.
This means that at a time when it would be beneficial to have multiple sessions to get out of a hole, only one or two sessions are attended instead. This won’t help to solve the problems or issues that are being encountered. At times of extreme stress, more sessions are often needed so that progress can be made out of the crisis and into a more positive and healing place.
It can be even more beneficial to engage in coaching or counselling when you are feeling okay about everything but still want to make changes within yourself or to your life, so that you are able to feel even more positive.
At these times, you are in a position to give serious thought to how you want to be and what you want your life to look like. Rather than looking at the question from a position of what you think is lacking in your life or what you don’t want, you are able to see things in a more positive light. This means you are better placed to consider what you can add to your life and what you want more of, rather than looking at what you want to get rid of.
However, whether you are in crisis or not, it is always helpful to work out how you would like to behave differently, or how you want your life to look in the future. If this ultimately means letting go of emotions, thoughts, beliefs, or behaviours, then it is possible to do this.
Sometimes it requires effort and action for this to occur, so you may need to give yourself time to effect change. To instil a new habit or way of thinking, you may need to carry out the new behaviours consciously for three to four weeks before they become more automatic.
It’s also important to enter into a relationship with your coach or therapist that is accepting, respectful, and focuses on your growth. Their role is to help you to become a better version of yourself, so allow them to be a part of your growth.
Trust is important. You should feel that he/she is working for you in your best interests, that they believe you can become more integrated, and that everyone has the capacity to change.
It’s worthwhile taking the time to check out a potential life coach or counsellor before you make a proper start on your journey. Ask questions and see if their philosophy and approach fits both with how you see things and how you want to be seen. If they talk about themselves out of context, take the focus away from you, or give you advice that’s unwanted, then perhaps you should try someone else. The focus of any session should always be on you and your issues or problems. Questions should be geared to finding out about what you want and how you want to be, and designed to help you to get there.
Overall, it’s about finding the right time for you to start the self-change process, and finding the right person to share that journey with.
The more proactive you can be in this process, the better off you will be. Take action now.