Recognising the Need for Change
Every now and then we need to take time to look at our lives and to figure out if we are on track. You don’t necessarily need to have a goal or goals that you are trying to achieve, but you do need to be able to look back at what’s been happening over the last six months to a year and assess whether the outcomes have been positive or negative. Do you feel that you have made some progress, however you want to measure it?
Areas to Explore
Look at each area of your life, such as physical health, home life, relationships, finance, work or career, hobbies, self-esteem, emotional life, assertiveness, and your personal growth.
Explore what is happening in each aspect of your life. Ask yourself which of these areas you would consider to be in a happy or positive state. Can you say that you are feeling good about each area, or are there one or two where things are not going so well?
If you believe that you could do better in a particular area of your life, then think about what you would like to change about it. What would you be doing differently if you could change that part of your life so that it becomes how you want it to be?
It is important to explore only those things that you can do differently, as this is what is under your control. Essentially, we can’t change others, we can only change ourselves. Once you change, then perhaps others may change in response, but you need to instigate that initial change in yourself as the first step.
Recognising when you are stuck
Some of the things that you might recognise in yourself and which indicate that change needs to occur:
1. You are unhappy
2. You feel resentment towards another person or other people
3. You don’t feel listened to
4. You’re always doing things for others, not for yourself
5. You have low self-esteem
6. You have uncontrolled rages or become angry over little things
7. The past is intruding into the present
8. You set goals but don’t achieve them
9. Others have said you have a problem
10. You have relationship issues or problems
11. You know that you should stand up for yourself more
Recognising these things in yourself is the first step towards recognising that something needs to change. If any of the above triggers something for you, then you should at least think about taking some action towards finding solutions.
One of the first actions you might take is to read a self-help book on an appropriate theme. Another could be to assess the areas of your life in which you have identified the need for change, and really begin to explore what is happening and how this affects you, as well as how it affects others. What are the positive and negative outcomes that are created? How would these be different if you changed your behaviour? And how might these changes then manifest in your actions and relationships? Would they be positive or negative for you and for others?
Another positive action you can take is to make contact with an experienced counsellor like Diana Hutchison. You can phone her on 0417 295100 to find out more or to book a counselling session. Take action today!